Skip to main content
Minnesota Musings

Facebook, Funerals and Friends

By June 11, 2021No Comments

I have far fewer friends than I had years ago. I prided myself on the number of friends I had at one point. Facebook helped to perpetuate this illusion of friends by the sheer number of, well “friends” I had on it. They’re not really true friends sorry to say. Sure, they may interact with a like or comment, but would they show up to my funeral like a friend would? I bet the only thing I would get after dying is a comment on my Facebook page – “He was a really good guy. He will be missed.” How do you even know I was a good guy? I could have been a serial killer for all you know. And the real reason why I lived in Japan was to escape authorities in my home country. With overwhelming evidence they were on to me after finding the knife with my prints on them.

I was inspired by this topic of friends and funerals after having seen a picture on Facebook of all places. It was simple, a church funeral, casket and few people standing around with a caption, “According to Facebook he had a lot more friends.”

Would any of you show up to a funeral of those you are friends with on Facebook? I know I wouldn’t. Cruel right? Wrong! Think about it. If I were to show up to every one of my Facebook friends funerals, I would have no life. It would be one funeral after another. A testament to the number Facebook friends I have. And to make matters worse, I would be flying halfway around the world to attend them. What a toll that would take on my bank account. Not to mention as I’ve gotten older it takes much longer to get over jet lag. As a result, I would be so out of it I’d have no idea whose funeral I’m even attending. Furthermore, I would be there for a week at most, return home only to have to recover from jet lag all over again. And just as I recovered pull up my Facebook page to see yet another “friend” has died only to have to repeat it all over again­­–Fly, jet lag, attend, fly, return, jet lag.

I think you are getting the picture about how much of my life would be dedicated to flying and recovering from jet lag all because of attending my Facebook “friends” funerals.

No thanks, I’ll just comment on your page how good of a person you were and you will be missed.

Leave a Reply